You’re either your greatest coach or biggest opponent - the good news is you get to make the choice

Learning To Dream

Who is Renae?

I grew up in a tiny suburb in Australia that most of you have probably never heard of, called The Patch. They called me the “Cabbage Patch Kid,” so I’m sure you can imagine how small this place was. Growing up, our home may not have been filled with fancy material things but my parents always stressed the wealth of family.

Our backyard was the place my siblings and I would spend most of our time. We would create these grand adventures. We came up with entire universes and fantasies and big, magical stories and lived them out with each other. That backyard meant so much to me. It was filled with endless possibilities. There were no limits to what we could do, who we could be, or where we could go. And even though we didn’t have many material things, and we grew up in this small, isolated town that people usually didn’t leave, when I was playing in that backyard, I let myself dream.

I let myself believe that I could and would be more. And I’ve spent my whole life since those days trying to get back to that little girl who believed - and knew - that she could take on the world and win. 

Do you want to know what my very first goal was?

In Grade 6, at 12 years old, I proclaimed in front of my class and the entire school that I wanted to play for the Australian netball team. Now you may not know, but Netball is huge in Australia. And I was (and still am!) obsessed. I had posters of my favorite players from the Australian national team plastered up on the wall in my room. I watched all the games. And the day I made that proclamation in front of my school, my life’s mission was set. I was going to do whatever it took to be one of the best netball players on the best team in the world. It was all finally happening for me. And I wasn’t happy. 

Stuck on Auto-Pilot

Stuck on Auto-Pilot •

By the time I was 23, I had finally made it to the Australian team and in my first year, I won International Player of the Year. I was doing everything I wanted to do - so why don’t I feel better?

Why aren’t I happier?
Why am I never content? 

The lifespan of an athlete’s career is so short. You’re not only competing against your body and injuries, you’re competing against younger, faster, and stronger players that are approaching quickly on your heels, threatening to take your spot. I sacrificed a lot to get to where I was; I missed birthdays, weddings, and graduations. You name it and I probably skipped it in favor of another workout instead. I convinced myself that I was only doing what I needed to do to stay the course. And, for the most part, it paid off.

By the time I was 25, I was at the top of the sport. And then my team dropped me. I was gutted. I let myself wallow in self-pity for too short a time and got right back to work. I picked up and moved interstate and started playing for another team, where I’d eventually become captain. We won a premiership together and a ton of medals along the way. I was back on top. Until one day, a teammate sat me down and gave me feedback that changed my life: “Renae, we feel like you’re a total robot. There’s never any emotion from you.” I was shocked. Mostly because deep down I knew that I had been found out. I was a robot.

I was on Auto-Pilot

I never broke or allowed even a second of non-composure. I had thrown everything - including myself - by the wayside in pursuit of my goals. I had completely forgotten how to be vulnerable and honest with the people around me and with myself. I never let myself enter those recesses of my brain that whispered, “What if this isn’t the way?” Because admitting that I was going about this wrong, meant that I had failed. And failure was the one thing I was most terrified of.

I’ve worked hard to get here. I’ve had to learn, unlearn, and relearn so much. I’ve had to push back on what I thought people wanted or expected from me and prioritize what I wanted for myself. I’ve experienced brutal lows in both my professional and personal life that I thought would end me. And despite every circumstance thrown at me, I came out of it better. Challenging moments are where I shine. I can take a crisis moment and break it down into its smallest parts and dissect it into smaller, more manageable pieces. I love to learn. Whether it’s navigating moves across the world, raising three children, one of whom is autistic, trying to create and develop my new career ambitions, or just being Renae in the quiet moments, I am 100% committed to being my most whole and authentic self in every sphere I show up in. 

It is my dream to help other young athletes do the same. I want to remind you that while you’re pursuing those goals, there’s still a lot of life to be lived. Don’t push yourself into the margins because the longer you’re there, the harder it is to pull yourself out later on. Trust me, I know. 

Unconventional. Independent. Disruptor

These are the qualities I embrace and love about myself.

I am the ultimate Disruptor

I’ve never done anything traditional in my life and that’s a fact that I am immeasurably proud of today. I’ve accomplished things that nobody thought I could and I did them in my own, unique Renae way. And now, in this new chapter, I am starting fresh again. And I’m figuring it out as I go because I only have one person to report back to—myself. 

Once I learned to stop resisting the truest parts of me - the parts of me that wanted to be curious, to be soft, to be understood - I unlocked a new level of growth. And I want to help you tap into the traits that set you apart from everyone else and help you realize that those are the things - not how well you fall in line - that help you win. 

Follow Me

LinkedIn | @renaeingles